Solution: Beat the crap out of Irvine first because he's all bark no bite, Chop off Zell's hands making him useless. Then take Quistis and Rinoa back to my place.
Circumstance: Selphie is all alone. I'm sure you can think of a way to help her
Solution: Sure- I screw her so hard- she's spayed.
Circumstance: Zel uses his legs, Quistis whips you- Rinoa "Mega Flare's" you with bahamut, Squally uses his lionheart gunblade and does the lionheart on you- rinoa goes angelo star on your ass- Irvine headshot's you with pulse ammo- selphie blames you- and summons GFs like theres no tomorrow- etc...
Solution: grab Zell and use him to absorb the bullets, Punch squall since he doesn't have his blad and can't do the attack, kick Irvine in the crotch, grab the whip from Quistis and use it to tie the 3 girls up while they're busy summoning.
Circumstance: I have one too many girls.
Solution: I take them of your hands.
Circumstance: You're left with the boys.
Solution:
Circumstance: You are left with me...
Solution: I can think of worse people to be left with.
Circumstance: I ate too much chocolate, and now am very hyper.
Solution: Get you a hamster running wheel...... Enjoy expelling your energy....
Circumsatnce: You run so fast on it you get stuck in a time warp....
Solution: Save lincoln! Then go back (Or forward) in time and stop Kennedy from getting shot.
Circumstance: I'VE MESSED WITH THE NATURAL ORDER! LIFE AS WE KNOW IT IS COLLAPSING IN ON ITSELF!
Solution: Don't I have powers returns time back to its original time and space but I waste have my energy....
Circumstance: Time is back to normal but I don't have enough power left to close the black hole alone....
Solution: Leave it. What's the worse that could happen?
Black hand from pit: You will die! *Grabs shadow*
Shadow: Well, ask a stupid question.
Circumstance: I dropped my soda, oh, and some wierd alternate dimension is trying to destroy us.