I'm going to say this every other post, just so you don't miss it.
PLEASE DON'T REPLY!
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"A confused young actress I�ve never met is telling me I was amazing in bed."
"I'm not a salesman, but stuffing golf club catalogues into the mailboxes of loft-dwelling families who can barely afford to pay $950.00 a month in rent seems like a bad marketing strategy."
I'm going to say this every other post, just so you don't miss it.
PLEASE DON'T REPLY!
If you want to reply, use a private message. I want to keep this thread continuous with my own quotes.
"Hey, I'm a 23-year-old depressed loner who hated his peers in college, but you didn't see me going on shooting sprees."
"I wonder if illegal immigrants in other companies are as nonchalant about leaving the premises when the government comes for an inspection."
I'm going to say this every other post, just so you don't miss it.
PLEASE DON'T REPLY!
If you want to reply, use a private message. I want to keep this thread continuous with my own quotes.
Career counselor: What are your long-term goals?
Me: Well, someday, I
"The fire alarm at 11:00 P.M. was kind of exciting, but the fire alarm at 2:30 A.M. was just annoying."
I'm going to say this every other post, just so you don't miss it.
PLEASE DON'T REPLY!
If you want to reply, use a private message. I want to keep this thread continuous with my own quotes.
Me: Hello.
Kathy: Hello.
Me: Hello.
Kathy: Hello.
Me: Who is this?
Kathy: It's Kathy. Why did you call?
Me: You called me.
Kathy: No I didn't. *Click*
"Has anybody considered that America's economic problems are caused by too many jobs that offer no goods or services but are merely predicated on the state of the economy?"
I'm going to say this every other post, just so you don't miss it.
PLEASE DON'T REPLY!
If you want to reply, use a private message. I want to keep this thread continuous with my own quotes.
Her: so I know you don't have a ton of experience with girls but do you have at least some
Me: That depends on your definition of experience.
Her: I mean anything?
Her: kissing
Her: sex?
Her: cuddling?
Her: oral?
Her: anything?
Her: sorry to be so blunt
Her: just interested
Her: like to know what i am dealing with
Me: Experience is a funny thing.
Me: If your assessment of someone as suitable is based entirely on experience...
Me: And if every other woman judges the same way...
Me: Every man in the world would be in a Catch-22.
Mom: What would you like for Hanukkah?
Me: I already gave you several hints. I sent you an email back in July.
*After forwarding the email*
Mom: Oh... I never received this email.
Me: Mom, I just forwarded it from my Sent folder. There was one recipient. You see who it was?