09-13-2006, 10:46 PM
Working on Chapter 1 edit and CHAPTER 2 IS DONE! >XD
[quote=I]
Chapter 1
Flames
[quote=I]
Chapter 1
Flames
Poll: What do you think of the first chapter? You do not have permission to vote in this poll. |
|||
Lovin' it! | 3 | 75.00% | |
Good. | 1 | 25.00% | |
So-So. | 0 | 0% | |
Bad. | 0 | 0% | |
Terrible! | 0 | 0% | |
Not my style. | 0 | 0% | |
Total | 4 vote(s) | 100% |
* You voted for this item. | [Show Results] |
Dispair of the Cursed: Chapter 2 is complete! >X3
|
09-13-2006, 10:46 PM
Working on Chapter 1 edit and CHAPTER 2 IS DONE! >XD
[quote=I] Chapter 1 Flames
09-15-2006, 07:45 AM
Thanks! Good luck with... You know what. And... Good luck with something travel related too!
09-15-2006, 10:53 AM
The only problem I'd like to point out is that your characters lack a decent picture for me to visualize. You need to develop the story narritive a little more so the reader isn't completely lost. What does Kerred look like? Where does Derel live? What does it look like?
If you expand the narritive bigger I think you'd have a set story, kinda like a pre-developed Eragon to some degree. If you desire any help, I can offer some advice to get yourself some vivid characterization and descriptions! Other than that I can't complain.
09-15-2006, 11:09 AM
*bows to Marine* That is why I posted it here. I would be honored. (I am NOT kidding!)
To the people of the DaD: I am still improving this chapter. ^_^ ANY comment is welcome. |
« Next Oldest | Next Newest »
|