I dont know what to do anymore.

[Sabre of Pain]

are you talking about suicide? what makes you think you have the right to just let it all go if anyone should be released from this torment it should be me but you know what? you cant just run away from your problems like that its not that easy because no matter how you look at it its more than just your life if you were to commit suicide you would hurt everyone around you i have thought about suicide so many times you have no idea but no matter how bad it gets theres always someone out there worse off than you chugging along living day to day no you dont have the right let it all go whether you like it or not your part of this world and your in it for more than just you

I wish to smile and have a GF or BF again

yeah? well suck it up asshole ive never had a bf or gf i mean sure i know alot of boys and girls that are friend but ive never been in a relationship before what about the people like me huh? how do you think i feel? if you think just because your having a bit of relationship trouble your life is in the gutter you are sadly mistaken you have no idea how long i could rant and cry about my life but am i gonna go and kill myself because of it? no not yet anyways the only time you ever have the right to do that is if you are in constant pain and are going to die soon anyways

my advice: go have a cry rant to someone about everything that makes you angry or sad (if you theres nobody you want to talk to hire a professional) then get over it and get on with your life