02-18-2007, 11:14 PM
I'm afraid I read it too much as fan fiction, and kept thinking in terms of "That wasn't in the series... wasp?"
However, as a peice of original fiction, it's good, very Lord of the Flies. I can't help but recoil at the thought of the murder, as I was still thinking in terms of the series. I did, however become slightly confused for a moment, thinking for a brief period that the twin and the leader were going into the woods and kissing. That's probably becuasee I skipped a word or two, or something, though.
I always enjoy your reflections: that a girl should find fat replusive when she doesn't seem to treat the murder of a guy with a single flinch against her new partner is high on my list of "disturbing".
However, as a peice of original fiction, it's good, very Lord of the Flies. I can't help but recoil at the thought of the murder, as I was still thinking in terms of the series. I did, however become slightly confused for a moment, thinking for a brief period that the twin and the leader were going into the woods and kissing. That's probably becuasee I skipped a word or two, or something, though.
I always enjoy your reflections: that a girl should find fat replusive when she doesn't seem to treat the murder of a guy with a single flinch against her new partner is high on my list of "disturbing".