01-27-2007, 05:20 PM
Well I got back only an hour or two ago. It wasn't as bad as I expected, though I did feel a bit out of place for a bit. I reconnected with a lot of cousins and my uncle and in the end, I'm glad I went. Saw my father's grave for the first time since his burial which was nice. Apparently they still cared enough that I was family to ask me to be one of the pallbearers which actually meant alot to me. Of course I unfortunately had to decline thanks to my knee condition. It would've snapped in a second under the weight (My uncle was not a small man) but they understood which made me feel better.
I went to the funeral like I said, and I was able to connect with my cousins very well. Longevity isn't very impressive in my family so my cousin had already lost his dad a few months after mine, and my other cousin was the son of my uncle that had died, so we talked a bit. No male on my dad's side of the family has lived much farther past 60. My dad was in his early 50s, my uncle was roughly a year younger, and my uncle that died this time was only a couple years past 60. I don't think my grandpa even made it to 50. Lucky me.
I was thinking that too. And if it had been another uncle I would've been much more defiant to go, but this was my favorite uncle, and the reason he couldn't get down was because he had had a stroke and a few years before that some brain problem (Another stable in my dad's side of the family) so he was at the mentality level of maybe a 5 year old and needed to be watched all the time or he'd hurt himself. And since he was my namesake I felt like I needed to go.
*Throws cookies at everyone*
If you had seen me you probably would've taken a shot at me. Read the last paragraph to find out why.
Not so much they didn't notice, with my mom's e-mails I'm surprised the whole country didn't know, but so much as they didn't really do anything about it. No visits, no calls, no nothing.
The lack of communication was a minor deal, I know that sounds wierd but let me explain. When my dad was alive he wanted to be cremated. That's what he wanted, but when he died they wouldn't hear of it. They didn't care at all for his wishes they wanted a proper catholic funeral with an open casket, a burial, and all that stuff. I've never forgiven them for denying him his final wish. And I never will.
I did, and I think they opened up more because they saw that I still wanted to be a part of the family. I swapped e-mails so hopefully we'll stay in touch. Oh and before I forget, *Presses a button and the floor falls away to pit of boiling lava* Just to give you some motivation besides the cookies.
*Presses a button and the jar blows up in a firey holocaust* I figured DMX would've been the first to try that. But I still got to blow up someone so I'm happy.
Funeral's aren't meant for the dead person, again sounds wierd but I'll explain, it's for the survivors to deal with the grief of a family member passing. I've actually said that when I die my family can go ahead and burn my body to ash and stick me in a kitty litter for all I care. The body is nothing more than a mass of diffrent elements. It's a sense of closure that the family needs to continue on after paying their respects to the dead person's life.
Thank you all for caring. And on a lighter note, becaus you know tat as the leader of SDP I can't end a post seriously. The second I crossed the boarder into Wisconsin the first thing I did was roll down my window and stick out a bear's flag. The second thing I did was pull it back in and roll up the window at the sound of a gunshot.
Quote:But you don't have to show it or even go to the funeral.
I went to the funeral like I said, and I was able to connect with my cousins very well. Longevity isn't very impressive in my family so my cousin had already lost his dad a few months after mine, and my other cousin was the son of my uncle that had died, so we talked a bit. No male on my dad's side of the family has lived much farther past 60. My dad was in his early 50s, my uncle was roughly a year younger, and my uncle that died this time was only a couple years past 60. I don't think my grandpa even made it to 50. Lucky me.
Quote:If someone doesn't give a shit then it's hardly worth making an effort to care in return. But that's just me.
I was thinking that too. And if it had been another uncle I would've been much more defiant to go, but this was my favorite uncle, and the reason he couldn't get down was because he had had a stroke and a few years before that some brain problem (Another stable in my dad's side of the family) so he was at the mentality level of maybe a 5 year old and needed to be watched all the time or he'd hurt himself. And since he was my namesake I felt like I needed to go.
Quote:GIMMIE DA GAWD DAMN COOKIES!
*Throws cookies at everyone*
Quote:Your coming to Wisconsin? Well come on up dude lol we just got a lot of snow though so be careful driving, Oh and if I see ya I will say hi
If you had seen me you probably would've taken a shot at me. Read the last paragraph to find out why.
Quote:Dad's side of the family must be pretty damn cold if they didnt even notice one of their relatives had cancer.
Not so much they didn't notice, with my mom's e-mails I'm surprised the whole country didn't know, but so much as they didn't really do anything about it. No visits, no calls, no nothing.
Quote:They are family but if family forgets you even exist they are dead to you inside. I mean if they forgot to write or call in like a year thats ok but not 10 years.
The lack of communication was a minor deal, I know that sounds wierd but let me explain. When my dad was alive he wanted to be cremated. That's what he wanted, but when he died they wouldn't hear of it. They didn't care at all for his wishes they wanted a proper catholic funeral with an open casket, a burial, and all that stuff. I've never forgiven them for denying him his final wish. And I never will.
Quote:I really think you should go just to show them you care. Maybe that'll make them feel horrible when they know what they did by not paying you the needed attention. So in that way, you'll be doing a nice attitude to your dead uncle, and you'll also get them to know what's being family for real.
There, two on one. Now I gotta find a way to reach those cookies! *Tries climbing up to reach the cookie jar*
I did, and I think they opened up more because they saw that I still wanted to be a part of the family. I swapped e-mails so hopefully we'll stay in touch. Oh and before I forget, *Presses a button and the floor falls away to pit of boiling lava* Just to give you some motivation besides the cookies.
Quote:Crimson: COOKIES! *bursts through a wall and knocks the cookie jar off the shelf, carrying it off in a frenzied rush*
*Presses a button and the jar blows up in a firey holocaust* I figured DMX would've been the first to try that. But I still got to blow up someone so I'm happy.
Quote:I voted no. He doesn't have much conexion with you and beside he's dead duh like going would mean much anyways.
Funeral's aren't meant for the dead person, again sounds wierd but I'll explain, it's for the survivors to deal with the grief of a family member passing. I've actually said that when I die my family can go ahead and burn my body to ash and stick me in a kitty litter for all I care. The body is nothing more than a mass of diffrent elements. It's a sense of closure that the family needs to continue on after paying their respects to the dead person's life.
Thank you all for caring. And on a lighter note, becaus you know tat as the leader of SDP I can't end a post seriously. The second I crossed the boarder into Wisconsin the first thing I did was roll down my window and stick out a bear's flag. The second thing I did was pull it back in and roll up the window at the sound of a gunshot.
"Stand tall and shake the heavens!" - Xenogears.
