Funny Joke(18+ or anyone who doesn't care) (non-digi)

[UnknownH]

Burn!
And now for some of my own humor as well as some I found on the internet.

Chicks dig emos.
Joke about something. Possibly related to anime.

Little attire and large endowments is a nice way of saying she dresses like a stripper and has a big rack.
Joke about morrigan from darkstalkers after looking at a drawing someone made.

Here's somethings I heard around the net.

Heard in a Homosexual Marriages topic:
To be honest, I think a better question is how do you decide who takes whos name?

We have but one giant bell here in Pennsylvania, and it's cracked.
Well, if SOMEBODY hadn't celebrated the president's birthday by ringing a bell that was fixed by a CANDLEMAKER...
Hey, Christianity's based on a Jew. Sometimes, that kind of shit works.

And this is the 500th post in this topic.

[Death]

One day old man Stumpy and his wife Martha went to the Illinois State Fair. There is this man selling plane rides in his single prop show plane for $10 per person. Stumpy looks to Martha and says, "Martha, I think I really should try that." Martha replies, "I know you want to Stumpy, but we have a lot of bills, and you know the money is tight, and $10 is $10." So Stumpy goes without. Over the next few years they return every year, and the same thing, Stumpy wants to ride, but Martha says no money.
Finally, when Stumpy and Martha are both about 70 years old, Stumpy looks to Martha, and says, "Martha, I'm 70 now, and I don't know if I'll ever get the chance again, so I just have to be naughty and have a ride in that there airplane." Martha replies in the same old fashion, and Stumpy kind of slumps down. The pilot is standing near by and overhears the conversation...

The pilot pipes up, "Excuse me folks, I couldn't help but hear your situation, and I have a deal for you. I'll take both of you up together, and if you can both make the entire trip without saying a word, or even making the slightest sound, I'll give the ride for free. But if either of you make a sound, its $10 each." Well, Martha and Stumpy look at each other, and agree to take the ride.

The pilot takes them up, and starts to do loop de loops, twists, dives, climbs and spins. No sound. The pilot lands the plane, looks back at Stumpy and says, "Sir, I have to hand it to ya, you didn't make even the slightest sound and that was my best stuff." Stumpy looks back at the pilot and says, "Well, I was gonna say something when Martha fell out, but $10 is $10!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
For decades, two heroic statues, one male and one female, faced each other in a city park, until one day an angel came down from heaven.

"You've been such exemplary statues," he announced to them, "That I'm going to give you a special gift. I'm going to bring you both to life for thirty minutes, in which you can do anything you want." And with a clap of his hands, the angel brought the statues to life.

The two approached each other a bit shyly, but soon dashed for the bushes, from which shortly emerged a good deal of giggling, laughter, and shaking of branches. Fifteen minutes later of naughty fun, the two statues emerged from the bushes, wide grins on their faces.

"You still have fifteen more minutes," said the angel, winking at them.

Grinning even more widely the female statue turned to the male statue and said, "Great! Only this time you hold the pigeon down and I'll crap on it's head."

I have to share this site with yall! http://naughty.jackassjokes.com/

[Misty]

I like the first one. That is hilarious. poor poor martha

[mentalguy]

This one big lawyer from the city decided to take time away from his busy day and went out to the farm and shot a duck.

The farmer walks out Of his building upon hearing the shot and screams at the city guy - "HEY You Cant shoot that duck on my property. That duck belongs to me. Hand it over!"

The city guy says, 'Hell no I shot him so I get to keep him!"
The farmer and the city boy decide to settle it country style (which is to kick each other in the nuts till the other one falls over")

So the farmer goes first and slams the city boy a nice hard stiff kick. Upon receiving the kick, the city boy damn near colllapses from the pain.

The city boy regains his balance And studders "Its my turn"
The famer looks at him and says - "aw Hell, keep the damn duck!

[UnknownH]

Sucker. You always go first in roshambo. Oh and,
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-q6Ok3zBdFg
Dude, we know what this guy is using his dell for.

[blueeyedgabulvo0o]

ROFLS Unknown....that is hilarious...and so honest.. :shock:

I have a video here that isnt funny but I chuckled at this.
[url]http://www.ebaumsworld.com/2006/07/live-action-mario-brothers.html
[/url]

talk about boredom.....mario style[/quote][/u]

[Shadowknight]

Speaking of Ebaum's world.

http://newgrounds.com/portal/view/276616

Funny song.

[blueeyedgabulvo0o]

well funny videos, can you say this baby is good

[url]http://www.ebaumsworld.com/2006/07/baby-break-dance.html
[/url]

that is all watch it breakdance.....

[Humon]

I LOVE the avitar, Big T

[Gunter VanCrimson]

Holy LOL!! HAHAHAHAHAHA!! I missed this thread!!