Grant a wish.

[Kurtz]

Granted, here, have a proper can. *passes one to you from my room*

I wish I could do that.

[Disturbed]

Granted *takes pepsi and looks in it*

I wish there wasnt anything wrong with it.

[Kurtz]

Granted, it's damn freezing cold as well.

I wish you enjoyed.

[Disturbed]

Granted colder the better *gulp*

I wish Kyo got something he wants

[Kurtz]

Granted, *summons Dot and hugs her*

I wish I could actually do that... *sweat-drops*

[Disturbed]

Granted, I cant think of anything though

I wish I knew Welsh

[Shadowknight]

Granted, *Makes a fat man appear*

Fat man: HI! My name's Welshie!

I wish I could find my glasses so I could read these wishes better.

[Casey the furry one]

Granted but they are broken.

I wish I had new glass to read better with.

[That One Internet Guy]

Granted, but they make you look like a dumbass.

I wish I had an omelette. At the perfect temperature for a human. On a clean plate. That isn't broken. And it's a clean, delicious omelette. And I have the omelette all to myself in an impenetrable room in NYC that only I can get in and out of and the door never breaks. And there's no one and nothing in the room with me, except the omelette and a few equally perfect utensils. That can't kill me. And the omelette is inanimate. And I'm not allergic to anything in it. And it's delicious. And the world is normal outside of the room. And nothing bad is going to happen. And it would have no weird side effects. And I wouldn't gain/lose weight. And it isn't drugged. And it isn't poisoned.

[Casey the furry one]

Granted but you find a baby chickens eye in your omelette and you throw up what you already eat of it

I wish a had a steak that was blue not the color blue the cooking term.