Everyone else's Drabbles *sticks tongue out at Cerceus*

[Nate Hunter]

Name: Poetic Perfection
...
Word count: 100(99 if you count "soul-lit" as one word.)

I do. Hyphenated words are a single word, whether the hyphen is present to provide a line-break or to combine the words. I think I can let 1 word shy or over slide better than 18 though...

Masses of soul-lit stars guided one's eyes around the breathtaking Van Gogh view, the tranquility of the Werewolf's muse, swirling with serenity the calming waves meeting the symphonic repition of a heartbeat. The salty, transparent, bliss rejuvenating the mind as it soothes the senses, barely breathes moisture onto their feet.

Gabumon's chest began to rise in harmony with each wave, he glances to the right and sees Matt enjoying the poetic night. Slightly blushing and in a soothing tone. "Matt, this night is special."

Matt turned towards him, wrapping one arm around him, smiled warmly whispering, "Now its perfect."...

How are stars guiding one's view unless one is looking to the sky? If one looks towards the sky, how is one aware of the transparency of the water?

This drabble seems to me to be overly filled with adjectives hoping to lure the reader into a deeper emotional connection when the words present are particularly vague.

Also, you used the wrong "its" -- in this contest the wording (uncontracted) is "Now, it is perfect." Contracted it should thus be: "Now, it's perfect."

I don't complain ont he story, but the expression is alost too poetic for a drabble. A drabble is intended as a "100 word novel", but yours seems too focused on the scene. The location is secondary to the characters in a drabble, because if half of the content is the stage, you may as well write a half-drabble (self explanatory, 50 words) for the characters.

(gulps) my first attempt.....

Go forth and improve thyself, apprentice! Set thyself upon a quest for great words of clarity and precision, but never neglect the simple and basic when those words are sufficient to the job at hand. We need not "crimson" nor "scarlet" when "red" fills the job.

This feedback given at 1:30 AM, I'm fairly wiped right now and about to crash for the night. This feedback given by personal request from the author, as well. Don't mind my extravagance, I'm tired and being plain in tiredness is not my style. I'm plain in wakefulness, grant me my quirks when I get tired.