Agh! Need Advice! Help!

[Adym]

Hey guys,

More complaints about my life, which just got a lot more complicated. So it all starts on Tuesday, August 3rd. My father came to me and told me that I need to get more friends. He thinks that since I don't have people that I can get together with at any point of the day, I don't have friends. I have friends that if I have a problem, I can go to them about it. Not if I have a passive want to be around somebody, they will come running over. That is what I consider friends. But he says, and I quote: "If you don't get more friends, you are going to look back on your life and cry!"

So that was incredibly un-encouraging. Then on Wednesday, August 4th, my cousin, who is practically my brother, so he will take the name Hapi, has an "emergency". So I literally ran three miles to his house, because the car wouldn't start. When I get there, it finds out that he just wanted to hang out. So I stuck around to hang out, until about two in the morning, today. So he says that I should just stay the night. So around three this morning, I'm about to fall asleep when he says this:

Me: Goodnight, Hapi

Hapi: Dude, you know your friend, Khaybat?

Me: Yeah, what about her?

Hapi: I was texting her the other day, she told me that she wants you and that she was gonna e-mail you a bunch of nude pics to prove it.

Me:*sits up, alarmed* What?! Your full of shit!

Hapi: Go check your e-mail.

So I go to check it out knowing the pics won't be there. They weren't. So I go back and tell him, so he starts texting her and asks her this Question:

Hapi's text: Did you send Dua those nude pics of yourself?

Khaybat's text: No I haven't got a chance yet, I'm camping. I have to go, but I will send them on Monday when I get back.

So now I'm conflicted. If I have sex with Khaybat, the friendship that I have with her, the one that I have come to cherish, will be changed forever. Further more, she is one of those girls that hates all of her ex's, so if I mess up, I lose her forever. She is one of my best friends and I have never thought of her romantically, but I guess that i could work. But I really don't want to jeopardize our friendship. I also don't want to disappoint her.

Once next Monday rolls around, It is only a matter of time before I am faced with this choice.

What should I do? Please, please reply!!

[Takatofan1986]

It's a hard decision. If it's just sex i'd say no, that could ruin the friendship, but... if you LIKE her... theres a posibility that BECAUSE your friends, it would turn into a beautiful relationship. But if its just about sex I'd say no, find someone who's not a friend for that. (eh, i wouldn't but thats a diffrent topic.)

[Adym]

Thanks for the advice.

I don't know what exactly she wants, and I don't expect to know. But my life basically went from peaceful waters to shit storm, literally overnight. And I don't have an exact bearing on my feelings for her either... Ugh...

[MagusKnight]

If you say no to dating, it could affect your friendship traumatically.
If you say yes, it could destroy your friendship traumatically.

Let me ask you this: Can you envision yourself being married to her?
If you can't even make the thought come up and enjoy it a little, say no.

[Adym]

Oh my god... I'm fucked... and the first person to poke fun at the terminology-situation relationship loses a finger.

I can imagine being married to her, but there are many steps between dating and marriage. That means many opportunities to mess up and lose a close friend!

Why is it that one person can make a decision that will change somebody else's life forever!

[Wisemon]

Just tell her how you feel about your friendship with her and how important it is to you. If she really just wants sex in addition to being friends, you can be friends with benefits. That might be the best scenario to come of this.

[Adym]

That is the best case scenario. But knowing my luck and knowing Khaybat's way of thinking, there is a very small chance that that will happen.

Uhg...only two days left until she gets back. Dread fills my soul every time I log into my e-mail, praying that a life changing message will not reside in my inbox. The countdown's begun. And when it hits zero, my life will change.

[Yumi]

the only thing i am going to say is ask her straight out what you need to know when you see her, make sure she isn't going to fast into it and good luck!

[Adym]

Thanks for the advice. I plan on doing so.

[Yumi]

Thats good :)