07-20-2006, 05:38 AM
Lemon II.
The first paragraphs is a good introduction: "Who is Dante?" It takes that domestic approch that I find so rare outside of the BBC. He's got his packed lunch and he's going on a day trip: it sounds like a traditional Sunday family outing.
But in the second paragraph, it becomes more than that: he has a goal. It's a quest, and adventure! Another are genre. I do like the "without a care in the world..." thing. A great twist on the happy-go-lucky things the genre usually deals with. It's a good bit of realism. The character shown in noting all these details of the day cycle is brillient, and the caution desplayed climbing back down.
Now we see what Roran was doing with the full moon: a foreshadowing through the use of traditional werewolf elements. Great, fantastic, but I didn't know anything about a cabin until he was fleeing toward it. A little time on setting would've been nice.
The care he takes over Weregrarurumon shows those same nature-loving tendencies as the observation of the day cylcle did. Good characterisation.
Wait a moment: Weregarurumon was left bleeding for a day? Lying there, slowly frittering away one of the most vital fluids in his body? Of, course, by now we realise that the answer to the question which made us read on, is, in fact, "He's an original character".
Weregarurumon's responce to Dante's groping is perfect. A titter certainly escaped me, there. The same, brief, upfront dialogue is displayed in Dante, but not in Weregarurumon. Weregarurumon is really, really cool.
It's not "regroup"; it's "recall".
Weregarurumon remain cool, but he's also fast.
"...Given to him by his lover." Dante is fast, too. Just met, and already they're lovers, dispite having no idea what species Weregarurumon is, or weather he likes the same sort of music. Why is everyone so ready to thank people trough sex acts in these stories? Is it currency in the Digital world?
Very brief scene. Refer to my earlier comments, although Roran did get some display of emotion trough action in this time. I rather think that only one set of "eclaimation mark, question mark" would have served it's perpose. The whole tooth think just irked me.
Well, it was enjoyable, certainly, and definately prooves that, if you really thought about it, you could slay us all with a keyboard.
I'll do another one, later.
The first paragraphs is a good introduction: "Who is Dante?" It takes that domestic approch that I find so rare outside of the BBC. He's got his packed lunch and he's going on a day trip: it sounds like a traditional Sunday family outing.
But in the second paragraph, it becomes more than that: he has a goal. It's a quest, and adventure! Another are genre. I do like the "without a care in the world..." thing. A great twist on the happy-go-lucky things the genre usually deals with. It's a good bit of realism. The character shown in noting all these details of the day cycle is brillient, and the caution desplayed climbing back down.
Now we see what Roran was doing with the full moon: a foreshadowing through the use of traditional werewolf elements. Great, fantastic, but I didn't know anything about a cabin until he was fleeing toward it. A little time on setting would've been nice.
The care he takes over Weregrarurumon shows those same nature-loving tendencies as the observation of the day cylcle did. Good characterisation.
Wait a moment: Weregarurumon was left bleeding for a day? Lying there, slowly frittering away one of the most vital fluids in his body? Of, course, by now we realise that the answer to the question which made us read on, is, in fact, "He's an original character".
Weregarurumon's responce to Dante's groping is perfect. A titter certainly escaped me, there. The same, brief, upfront dialogue is displayed in Dante, but not in Weregarurumon. Weregarurumon is really, really cool.
It's not "regroup"; it's "recall".
Weregarurumon remain cool, but he's also fast.
"...Given to him by his lover." Dante is fast, too. Just met, and already they're lovers, dispite having no idea what species Weregarurumon is, or weather he likes the same sort of music. Why is everyone so ready to thank people trough sex acts in these stories? Is it currency in the Digital world?
Very brief scene. Refer to my earlier comments, although Roran did get some display of emotion trough action in this time. I rather think that only one set of "eclaimation mark, question mark" would have served it's perpose. The whole tooth think just irked me.
Well, it was enjoyable, certainly, and definately prooves that, if you really thought about it, you could slay us all with a keyboard.
I'll do another one, later.