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Why do Bad Things Happen to People?
#1
I'm not going to even try and say I'm a good person, but I don't think I'm actually a bad person either. I hope those of you who read this will find some explanation for the difficulty I've been having in judging the October (Tragedy) Contest, let alone sharing those results.

First off, in the middle of October, last month, my mom came back from a business trip, I lost my wallet (which had every piece of ID that I need), and I found out that my parents are almost definitely going to separate with the coming of the new year. Compound that with a bout of depression and my realizing that would probably mean a divorce, and October was a horrible month. I didn't have much to give to anyone outside of my immediate family and close offline friends until about two weeks ago, whenn I realized I had missed my own deadline for the contest.

Then, I was going into a chat room last week and my mother saw me there, and we're talking about one of the "adult" chat rooms. She feels obligated to warn her friends there to protect her son (I'm fucking 20 for the sake of all that is human), and to warn me that I shouldn't be in that kind of room. Of course, with her being the problem, I'm already not speaking to her unless it's necessary, so all my old high school defenses come up and I just nod and say "Okay." Then, with my hopes high and set on getting to the GED this week, I find out that my new Social Security card won't come until about now, or sometime next week even, not to worry about my state photo ID.

And then next month I need to take the GED, find a job that isn't a Paper Route, and I don't have much left to give even myself, let alone family or others. I will try to hold a Christmastime Friendship contest here, but I cannot guarantee anything. And with the situations I'm in right now... Some of those tragedy stories are still giving me a hard time, because of how bad I feel like my life is. Support is what I need right now, and I'm not certain I can offer a prompt solution to the Christmas contest, if I even do hold it. If I do decide to hold it, I will post the guidlines next week Friday or Saturday.

I'm sorry about the scores, but I haven't finished judging the October Contest myself, so as soon as I do, I will share them. I will say in advance that Lord Archive's Courage has the best score I've ever given in a contest, so he will probably be the winner. This may be one of the last times I'm active here for a good while, so I'll make sure to finish these scores before I actually leave.
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#2
Hey, sorry to hear life's treating you so badly right now... Hope things'll brighten up soon.

About the divorce thing... Well, I'm the child of a divorced couple, and once you get over the initial shock and more or less used to it it's not so bad. I mean, usually, both your parents will still be around. Just because they split up doesn't mean one of them's just dropped from your life. And, after all, a clean divorce is always better than a messy relationship.

So my advice is, don't let things get you down and endure them as well as you can until better times arrive. Which, I hope for you, will be soon.
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#3
I've never had to deal with divorce but I imagine that it must suck. I can't even begin to tell you what the best thing to do to work through it is. I don't know if there's even a specific way that you should be approaching it. Most people that I know who've had parents that have divorced worked through it in a way that others might have seen as being "wrong" but in the end they turned out ok and their own relationship with their parents survived just fine. I guess that's all that you can work for in terms of your family. I don't really know what your relationship with your mother and father is but I would not give up hope that your relationship towards them as individuals has to change. But there is much I do not understand as well.

Yes, I know that feeling of getting "caught" doing something that you (an adult, I might add) know you have no reason to be ashamed of doing. I lived at home until I was 24 and my parents were constantly trying to play to role of the morality police when it came to the internet. They didn't and couldn't understand why I was doing it or that they really didn't have anything to worry about. But nevertheless they did and it resulted in some tension between us. I know what that's like and it sucks. Best to use the internet when you're assured of having some privacy (though not everyone is blessed with that). They also can't understand depression. They can try to listen and comfort you, but in my experience, it always ends in frustration for them. It's universal, and you're not alone if that's the case.

I misplace shit all the time. I lose my wallet or cell phone once every other week. I constantly lock my keys in my car, and by July of this year my parents were getting seriously pissed at me about it, because most of the time they'd have to come and bring me the spare keys. Losing a wallet is a serious matter though, and I feel for you, because that is a lot of stuff you'd have to replace and call people about. At least you're getting it worked out. If it affects your ability to sign up for the GED, don't fret. You're going to complete it soon. Don't worry. It's okay.

I know the stress of not having a job. It really eats at you, and makes you feel helpless. I've been looking for one for a few months now (something other than a paper route, yeah) and haven't had any success. Don't let yourself get sick over it though. Really, you've gotten this far. You'll find something. Have you tried holiday employment? Lots of stores hire workers just for the Christmas season. They're doing it right now though, so you might want to go apply really, really quickly if you think that's something you might want to do. It wouldn't be for long, just a few weeks, but you'd make some money and if you found that you liked it, there's a chance that maybe you could continue working there into the new year (though that depends on the store, and it's never gauranteed).

Surely there are people here who would help shoulder the burden of the Christmastime contest with you. I've recently gotten my muse back and am kind of returning to writing fanfics (it's been a prolific week in an extremely unprolific year) and I might just have to submit something to it, if it's held.

Anyway, try to relax. Do something like... like take a bath while eating twizzlers, or go to the library and get a book you've always wanted to read. Life is hard but you can get through it. If anything else comes up, let us know, okay? Wink
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#4
Hey, with divorce, losing stuff, and getting a job, I can feel for ya. Actually I am convinced forgetting things is genetic since everybody on my dads side of the family has problems trying to remember things like NOT to turn off the oven. Yeah, a couple years ago me dad messed up dinner because he forgot he was cooking anything.

Me ma and dad have been divorced since I was in the first grade. The divorce hit me kinda hard, especially since I have always had an extreme case of ADHD. So here I am, in a neighborhood with many happily married parents, loads of money to piss away, and they happen to know everybody very well. If my folks were still together and not fretting over each other and our finances so much they would have realized they were almost ignoring me and the fact that I virtually had no friends. Yeah, kinda hit me hard, was part of why I was depressed through most my grade-school years and why by the sixth grade I was already one grade short of failing. I still say I should have failed, but whatever.

The best advice I can give to you is get over it, especially at your age. You should be living your own life by now. After the GED you should be fine. There will be times when your parents will try and get you to do the classic "who do you love more?" and I have great adivce for that. Simply state you do not want to get involved in their relationship. Or do what I did and say "I don't like either of you until you both shut-up," but I don't suggest that.

As far as jobs go I am currently jobless and looking, but I am going to take a winter job up at the mountains where some of me family lives and works. (Any skiiers or snowboarders living in SoCal please try and visit Mt.Baldy during the winter.) You think it is tough now to get a job, I applied for three places and they all turned me down since I was not 18 yet. These three places were Radio Shack, Dairy Queen, and GameStop... three stores teens should be able to work at. All I can say you probably already know about: go into town, look for anybody who is hiring, and apply to everybody you see. If more than one job accepts you, then take two jobs or simply choose the job you want to work at the most.

Blessed Be,
~Arrowhead~
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#5
well here's my sage advice if bad thing didn't happen the world would break
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#6
I hear you bro. I recently got hit by bad luck. *glares at patan* You know what I ment. My X-mas wish...shattered like a plate glass window on the floor of the sistine chapel. I AM ART PEOPLE! YOU CANT STOP THE ART!
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#7
:shock: :shock: Eep.. bad things... lots of bad things going on..
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#8
Bad things never get better, only worse...

Now I do have my GED, and I am working on dropping the weight I need to join the National Guard, so in a way my situation has improved quite a bit, but now there's not the possibility of divorce, there's a definite divorce in the future. I have a tendency to drown myself in fantasy when bad things happen which may lead to another divorce when it does happen, because I know right now that I'm taking all of this bad news far too well. I only hope that my parents divorce doesn't end up in my divorce from reality, and if any of you are religious in any way, I hope you will pray for me over that.

I learned today about a dark secret in my family that I could have done as well without. Eighteen years ago, when I was three years old and my oldest brother maybe not even a whole year, my father had an affair. This justifies the divorce to me, whether it is my mother's reason for the divorce or not. But I have learned one hthing in my teen-age years, and that is that the sins of the father are too often committed again by the children. I want to think I'm different, but I'm no more pure or holy than he is, so I know that I run the risk of repeating his mistakes. Knowing this only makes it more obvious of how I could fall, and makes it something more for me to worry about.
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#9
i hope things will get better for you *prays for you*

by the way if your father hasn
Veemon's Followers
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