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Drug-darkfic
#1
I dont own digimon.

NC-17, a lemon. Not ment for anyone under the age of 18.

Dark fic, semi-rape, Ken x Kimeramon AU

Im evil Twisted





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By Clockwok_Knight

E-Mail-Wind_voyager@yahoo.com

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Drug

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Silver Door Saga P1-chp 1 AU


The air was damp and thick with the smell of dead things, some how familiar and frightening at the same time.

How long had it been since he had set foot inside the deep forbidding fortress of stone, too long.

He pulled the thin cloak around his thin frame as he slowly entered the gapping maw, the ancient wooden gateway having long rotted away. Leaving the fortress open to the harsh elements. Withered leaves blew across the scared stone floor among the desiccated remains of creatures long the walls. The sad remains of a war long over.

Ken shivered, he had forgotten all about this place of nightmares as he side stepped a skeleton.

He always came back, came back crawling on his hands and knees before the creature he had created.

Came back to it every time, crawling on the dusty floor of the cavernous hold like a slave coming to its master. He was supposed to be the master, him, the former Kaiser of the digital world.

Even now in the dark musty halls were frameless pictures hung on empty walls and dust gathered in corners, he could feel it. Feel its very presence every were in the maze of dark shadowy halls and rooms.

Time had still here, held in thrall by forces of the moon and stone so nothing moved in the fortress that was slowly crumbling to the relentless growth of the primal forest that over ran much of the smaller structures.

This place was forbidding and cold as the day he left it a year ago. He left it and the thing he hated so much, along with the mantel of Kaiser.

It called him back to the old fortress he had forgotten about .

The mind contained in the shell of patchwork parts was powerful and eclipsing, suffocating him in cold darkness, pulling him from the faint light that he clung to so desperately. It had called him back, after all this time he had forgotten but it had not.

The very creature he had created.

He never told anyone, hiding his own fear behind rage he could bare like a whip.

A cold dark fear welled up inside. He felt sick as a cold nausea washed over him in a wave, it was calling him.

Clutching his hands over his ears and squeezing his eyes tightly closed, it would not relent.

His world fell away to a spinning darkness, Ken tried to grasp at the edges it as it crumbled to dust as the darkness came flying up to met him. His cry of terror was cut off as it engulfed his mind like a wet blanket, suffocating and cold to the touch, surrounding his skin with a sticky wetness and stench of something rotten and old.

He twisted and squirmed in the grasp of what held him though he knew he could not escape it, not now, not ever.

He could smell it before he ever saw it, the smell of rotten things and a thick oily musk of its body as its closed around him none to gently as its pulled him into its own mind.

Ken gasped, trying to breath past the smell, clawing at the cold stone floor that comprised this floor.

It loomed from the darkness, moving with a fluid grace that belied its construction. Its large dark leathery wings folded across its long muscular back. Once, when he had first created it, it had been a mix of colors, now all faded to a deep dusky black except its eyes. Dark red eyes that stared through you.

Kimeramon was vaguely draconic, large black scales covered its lean body. Its fore arms were too long, the back legs powerful and short. Patches of long silky fur covered its back and a line of thick silky fur traveled under both sides of its jaw and under its neck, down its belly to just before its hips.

It was a terrifyingly beautiful thing.

Its head was long and skeletal, a pair of curling ram horns on either side, perched on a short but strong neck.

Everything about it was a giant puzzle, created from bits and pieces of other Digimon, much like Doctor Frankenstein
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#2
:shock: ...Wow...That...Was...Uhhh...As straight as I am...That lemon got me hard...And thinking...Pretty damn good though...
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#3
That was rather dirty. But sweet revenge...
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#4
This was very good.
Plot was one of its negative points, since all of it gathered around the lemon scene, with just a small part before it and a small one after it. The explanation that was given about it was reasonable, but I think using some scenes with Ken's behaviour towards Digimon, as well as his behaviour in real life, would help to intensify what is to follow.
I really liked the characterisation. Kimeramon had little to none of it, but the parts focused on Ken were great. He was shown to have a sadistic side while being the Kaizer, and you went even farther with his addiction to power. To see something he himself created overpowering him in any way would only emphasize his own strength, and that is something I can see him secretly enjoying in that stage. His lack of reaction while his brother was better than him in everything and his introverted and shy character after the Kaizer phase would support his position in the lemon scene too, showing in which ways his twisted personality can work. I had never seen Ken pictured remotely close to this, and certainly not in a lemon, so I liked the characterisation in this very much.
Your vocabulary was undoubtedly one of the best aspects of the lemon. This is the kind of story that brings me down about my own language skills, seeing as I'm not a native speaker. Only problem with it was the constant repetition of words like "drug" and "overwhelming".
Lemon scene now... There were a few flaws with it. It was beautifully described, but interrupting to show us Ken's thoughts and feelings was much of a turn-off. That's why I would suggest you add a setup in the beginning and move most of that part there, leaving only what's directly linked to the lemon scene.
Too few grammar errors to mention here, but the spelling ones are more serious. Confusing "were" with "where" all throughout the text, using "feed" where it should be "fed" and misspelling of a few other words... Not many people will notice it, but it's still there. Most of it can't be corrected through spellcheck, so you should get someone to point them out to you.
Minor punctuation mistakes, but they ruined parts of the story for me so editing them out would be appreciated. Commas where the sentence should have ended, and such.
The title's not the best choice, but it does fit. Good one.
That's all I have to say. I'm interested in reading more of your work in the future. Keep it up!
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#5
Hey, that was pretty good.

Wanna become a author at my lemon site?
[Image: Seethsig.jpg]

[Image: promo.jpg]

Lord Patamon Wrote:King of sadism alright, that's a perfect title for you
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#6
Dam, didnt think i was that good. Thanks for all the reviews :shock:
Im busy re-writing so its better.

I don need a proof reader, any one intrested?
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#7
I would like to take up your offer of ProofReading.

And you ARE that good, dont let anyone tell you otherwise.
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