I need to yell.

[Bee]

Ever have one of those days where you really need to talk to someone, just find some sliver of hope in a day that's otherwise shit? I've been having that all fucking week.

A few weeks back my girlfriend lost her computer, so I only get to talk to her for one measly hour a night. My friends are always too busy for my whining, either that or they just don't give a shit. I don't know anymore.

My dad lost his benefits, which leaves us with what he gets from social security, IF that holds out, and what little pay I get from work. Normally when my stress gets this bad I go out to the washout by the creek and go shoot my 9mm pistol. The recoil, the noise, the gunsmoke, and the destruction of the targets make me feel better. But now that the finances have been severely restricted, I can't go and do that anymore, and try and save ammunition for when it's really needed. Because of the finances being what they are, we are having to move once again, this time to where my grandfather and uncle are at, since they're willing to sell a house to my dad that's in the family for 1/5th of what we're paying for rent now. My internet, and my phone and it's marvelous 2-year contract don't work out there. Thanks alot T-Mobile. 7 years of customer loyalty doesn't mean shit when you move out to Butt-Fuck Egypt.

One of my friends is so nose-deep in his studies than anytime I bother him it's an inconvenience. Fine by me, everyone needs their education. When I try my other friend to let some steam off, He's STILL being humped by several different idiots from around the internet, and waiting an hour for a one-line post is about as calming as waiting in line at the DMV. I tried the last one of my circle of friends, the one who happens to be the closest to me by a whole 700 miles, and I get a VERY scathing text back from his number by his girlfriend saying she doesn't want him being a furry anymore and all this good shit. It was at this point I threw the connecting rod.

My life is slowly falling to shit and I have no way of releasing the stress or even feeling better about it. The Ammunition I have is now more or less worth it's weight in gold, and the few people I trust enough to genuinely care about my problems can't be around. I'm getting overwhelmed by moving to a place I don't want a go, possibly losing a job I don't even like, and all of the small number of friends that I have....they feel like they aren't even around anymore.

It's two in the morning, I have work in a few hours, and I can't even sleep because the pressure is to the point where I don't know if I can take it anymore.

I hate life, and I hate people.

I don't know how much longer I can take being pushed aside, stepped on, and having my opinions ignored before I snap and do something many people will regret. I seriously can't take much more of this shit....

I don't even think I'm asking for much....just someone to let me know things are going to get better....It's not my fault I'm not comfortable around new people, otherwise I would go out and get new friends...the ones I have I thought were enough, but I guess not....not whenever you're stuck looking over the edge and someone's trying to push you off it.

[Digimon Crazy]

Wow sounds like that sucks dude. Yeah life is a bitch like that most of the time. Sry about your dad's benefits btw no hard working person ever wants to here that. Also I hope you and your girlfriend get around tht little bump with her computer. And I take it by what you wrote that you live in Egypt of are planning to more over there or to a more remote location in it. But if you dont live in eqypt and are moving over there with money woes mabye not the best idea. Well the whole world economy is a bit abuzz right now and with all the uprisings in the middles east well not sure what to say or what i can since i dont live over there. And sry but i had to lol at that t-mobile comment since I think they suck and i have verizon. As for your friends well at least you can say they are there not much help but hey are there, some (like yours truly) dont really have that most times. And then losing your job because your moving is a big middle finger too I mean you said you don't like it but it's still a job and a way of income and to find another is always a pain in the ass no matter how small. Here in the US its also really really bad with jobs. Again thats life its always going to piss you off and stress you out I don't even hardly care when truly bad things happen because in hinesight I always see them coming or at least as a possiblity. All I can do is wish you your best you cant think its the end of the world things could get better the best thing is not to lose hope and if there is someone trying to push you off that cliff and there's no way to avoid it then you know what say fuck it and take that bastard with you XD. Seriuolsy you have my best wishes GL and God Bless.

[Bee]

Butt Fuck Egypt isn't a place in Egypt. >_< It's a phrase describing the middle of nowhere. I live in Texas.

[Digimon Crazy]

lol well never heard that saying used like that before XD

[Bee]

Well, lost a friend to the manipulative bitch he got pregnant....fuck him....calling me a "bad influence". For what, I've asked time and again. I have a job, I'm working hard to take care of a permanently crippled father, while trying to go halfway across the country to try and be with my girlfriend. I take care of pets and I pay bills, I even paid $140 towards helping a close friend get a new laptop. How am I a bad influence?

Fuck it. Fuck him. He burnt the bridge. I'm done. He can kiss the fattest part of my ass.

On a very meager plus side, I've gotten a chamber insert for my deer rifle to let me fire less-powerful and much cheaper pistol ammunition through it. I'm going to go blow off steam tomorrow down at the washout by blowing up clay targets.

[Digimon Crazy]

lol well hope you have fun at shooting btw that was pretty cool you modded your gun to use smaller bullets ^.^

[Bee]

It's called a Supplemental Chamber or a Sub-Caliber Conversion Sleeve. It lets me shoot .32 Automatic Colt Pistol cartridges out of a .303 Enfield. Despite the numbers, they both use the same diameter .312 inch bullet. Just the .32 Auto is a good deal shorter and less powerful.

[Wisemon]

Well, if you're taking care of pets, that's a major expense you can afford to lose. As long as you're moving, might as well make some better friends. The long distance relationship is up to you whether or not it's worth it.

[EmirLicht]

he's a furry, he won't give up his pets for the world.