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How to get girls. (Guide, for lonely guys)
#1
This isn't exactly rant per see but it may as well turn into one due to the context. This is a feature I did for my site. This isn't a guide to get you life partner, this is to get you laid. If you have troubles with such things, feel free to leave this topic. The reason I wrote this is because I remember I once read an advice of getting hookers if you can't get laid. Dear Lord.

Why should I have sex?: There's numerous reasons. First of all, it totally alters you so you're no longer shy to strike up conversation, you'll be able to please your future life partner better, etc... Ultimately, it all comes down to singular word; experimenting. We all only live once, which is why you shouldn't probably marry the first woman you meet.


First of all, a test! Which of these girls would you have sex with?



[Image: ugly%20woman.jpg] [Image: model_female_1_500height.jpg]

If you answer number 2, gongratulations mister virgin. Take a long good look at yourself. Unless you're a model (and chances are if you're in DAD in the first place you're not) then you shouldn't try to "score" models.

Of course I don't say you should screw horse faced women who tell you to call them "My little darling!!" All I'm saying is that use your own self judgement and look at yourself from mirror. If you have low expectations of yourself, aim lower. If not, aim higher. Congratulations, now you know the basics. Treat yourself for a cookie for we'll be starting to make you into a sexy lady magnet.

[Image: Ron%20Jeremy%20Super%20Mario4-717393.jpg]

This man is hairy, obesse, and his feet smell like vinegar. He's probably had sex with more women than this entire forum people have met combined. It's okay to begin crying.


There's several unspoken rules that you should probably get familiar with;

1) Avoid having sexual affairs with people from your work or from same school.

2) Don't do "friends."

3) Best places to find sex are the ones clubs, bars, parties, etc.

4) The more drunken, the easier they're to talk into bed. But be careful, overly drunk women may start to cry or pass out before sexual encounter or during it.

This is a scenario I'll lay down to you that's always worked for me. The setting is in bar and the night has been going for several hours already.

Now, the first impressions are the most important. That goes on without a saying. If the chick thinks you're a total and utter idiot, it'll stay in her head for the rest of the night.

There's several methods to aproach a woman. Feel free to pick any of these that best suit you.

1) The gentleman.

Aproach the woman, ask for a dance. If she says yes, that's cool and keep on reading. If not, don't be discouraged. Ask if you can still buy her a drink and then strike up a conversation. (Read bellow, conversation)

2) Have your friends introduce you.

It's a cliche but it works. Pretend if you're shyer than you are. Or if you are, then this is perfect for you. Have your friend do the introduction for yourself. Be warned, some women think this is a sign of a weak character while some think it's cute. Use fair judgement in the decision.

3) MISTER BIG T's way

I don't know if this works for anyone else but for me. But this is how I pick my ladies. After drinking enough and if no girl has come to pick me up by that (which, happens very often too) I'll choose a girl from the dance floor and start to dance with her by rubbing my body against her from behind. If you have a big penis, be sure to rub your erection against them. Then turn the lady around and begin tongue kissing. Alternatively, if I meet a woman for the first time at a party I may swoon the woman down and whisper my name before beginning tongue kissing. If you do and succeed in this aproach, feel free to skip all the way down after the kiss part.

CONVERSATION

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"It was this tiny as erected!!"
"Tee hee! His was THIS big!!"


So you've broken the ice in one way or another. Next thing is, you listen. I say listen because you won't be the one doing all the questions. Ask anything, like her job, her dreams, anything you think you should be interested when talking to her. The woman starts to babbel and speak. Listen to everything she says, look like you're really interested in what kind of NSYNC member she'd date, etc...

Don't talk much about yourself, only in response after girl asks you to or if it's fitting after the girl has finished talking.


Buy another/first drink to the lady.


Continue conversation, somehow relating to the first subject you already established. Make a small joke or something, make her laugh. If not, I suppose a honest smile would be a good one too. But important fact is the lady must be happy.

Alternatively; if she talks about something close to her, like her father going to hospital or something, console her. Hug her and if she starts crying just pat her back gently. It's the right thing to do even if you'd not want anything with her.


Continue discussion, talking, entertaining the lady and such. At one point, you'll get to the moment where you're supposed to kiss her. (If you didn't take my aproach, that is) You know it's the moment, because you two dreamily watch at each other "and the moment like stops." Lean your head towards her, she should be starting to lean hers towards yours too. She'll most likely close her eyes, you don't have to. When your lips come in contact, probe your tongue out and meet hers. Try and keep your twos tongues connected, as if they'd be dancing together.

AFTER KISS

Continue talking and entertaining. Buy a drink, or ask to dance again. (preferably, close ones) Kiss again after some time.


Now things start rolling by themselves after this point and you can carry out from there. That's it? Just talk some stupid stuff ever now and then and listen to the girl talking about her periods? You'd be amazed at how many times the only thing a woman needs is someone they can talk to. It'll get you far, even if you'd suck at the kissing.


That's all I can tell as an advice to you guys! Feel free to give me a line how it worked out for you and if you were able to get a girl.

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And then lesbo sex begins!!
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Lord Patamon Wrote:King of sadism alright, that's a perfect title for you
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#2
Quote:Unless you're a model (and chances are if you're in DAD in the first place you're not) then you shouldn't try to "score" models.
I'm a model with a brain, which is why I don't feel the need to attempt to "score." Of course, what you've got there is great advice for people who are willing to play by the rules.

This really isn't a rant, so I'm moving it.
[Image: AppealtoReason.jpg]
"I looked up and saw you;
I know that you saw me.
We froze but for a moment
In empathy."-Rise Against
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#3
Women (some men too, but not too many) like a man who will listen to them. Even the ugliest man can get a girl if he is a good listener.

My brother according to most of those I have spoken to.. Is a fairly good looking man.. I can't say one way or the other, because he is my brother, and I don't think that way.. But He is a very good listener.. and has a nearly perfect memory. So he ends up with a lot of girls (and some guys) wanting to take him home with them for an hour or two.

Play it right, and you can take half the bar with you. Screw it up, and you may need to find a new place to try to hook up.
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#4
Never had trouble starting relationships. Meaningful ones? Yeah, so far, not so lucky. A little fun from a few different people is good in and of it's own...
But i'm looking more into the lines of a serious relationship. Alas, the only matches I can find are at least 4 years older than I, and that just complicated things last time.

Oh, be sure to give the good people of this forum some credit. Just because you frequent a site of this nature doesn't mean that you are a social reject.
Renamon's Army
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#5
Renamon_S3 Wrote:Oh, be sure to give the good people of this forum some credit. Just because you frequent a site of this nature doesn't mean that you are a social reject.

Wait what? :?
[Image: Seethsig.jpg]

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Lord Patamon Wrote:King of sadism alright, that's a perfect title for you
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#6
Lol, point taken...

Not all I should say.
Renamon's Army
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#7
I'm not a reject.
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#8
I really have no idea still what you said Renamon.
[Image: Seethsig.jpg]

[Image: promo.jpg]

Lord Patamon Wrote:King of sadism alright, that's a perfect title for you
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#9
Quote:If you answer number 2, gongratulations mister virgin. Take a long good look at yourself. Unless you're a model (and chances are if you're in DAD in the first place you're not) then you shouldn't try to "score" models.
You know, Unknown here had a girlfriend that's better looking than that girl (who is not such a big deal to make her as unreachable, IMO) and he's just a normal looking geek. And a girlfriend for five months, not just an occasional fuck. And, if you don't know, take a look at the pictures of the guys here, and you'll know that most guys go from normal to good-looking. Don't treat them as if they were freaks of nature, because they're far from that.

Quote:3) MISTER BIG T's way

I don't know if this works for anyone else but for me. But this is how I pick my ladies. After drinking enough and if no girl has come to pick me up by that (which, happens very often too) I'll choose a girl from the dance floor and start to dance with her by rubbing my body against her from behind. If you have a big penis, be sure to rub your erection against them. Then turn the lady around and begin tongue kissing. Alternatively, if I meet a woman for the first time at a party I may swoon the woman down and whisper my name before beginning tongue kissing. If you do and succeed in this aproach, feel free to skip all the way down after the kiss part.
I don't believe that approach would work with someone who's not a slut or completely drunk.
Quote:That's all I can tell as an advice to you guys! Feel free to give me a line how it worked out for you and if you were able to get a girl.
Let me predict nobody will get anything.
Quote:I really have no idea still what you said Renamon.
He says you're calling all of us social rejects just because we come here.

Maybe we should lock this before the plates start to fly...What do you think, Unknown?
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#10
Maybe. Let's vote. Next three yeses lock this topic.
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