07-26-2006, 05:26 AM
This is one I'm very fond of. I don't know when it was originally posted, but I don't think the author, Coyote V, is around anymore. Sadly, this is his only fiction, despite it being listed as the first in a series. So, Computer Troubles and Pleasent Suprises. Why do I love it so much? Well, despite being the first chaper of a series, it's fine as a stand alone, like The Hobbit.
Anyway, to the reveiw. It's a Matt Izzy coupling: that has my interest right there. Comparitively, that's a highly original choice. And that first paragraph encompasses everything everyone hates about computers in a nutshell.
This leads to an amusing turn of events with sporting apperatus. "Pain" was used twice in one sentence, which doesn't sound very good. Missed the apostrophe out of "Joe's", too. Oh, well. Proofread, dear authors, proofread.
Now, that first passage has established everything. It uses a cheerful and humourous outlook to tell the story: even the heel of Matt's temper is turned into a small joke. The story has atmosphere. Write that down.
Izzy is spot on, isn't he? Coyote is a dab hand and making him lovable. "I'm going to make it L33T." I hate that code, but I couldn't help but smile.
"His naked lover laughed slightly.
""One step at a time, please!""
That's contradictory. Always watch out for that. Also, I have have come to the conclusion that the Digital World is basicly a harem: everyone's so fast, it may as well be.
Further humour from Matt. I like this chap: the comedic work just has layers of style. It's all derived from the characters, and nothing impossible happens. Comedy is at it's finest within the realms of plausiblity, although a good serving of Python is always welcomed.
A return to an earlier incident in the story: the way it all ties together like this gives me the impression that the author's thought long and hard about the effects of every event that occurs in this story. There may not be many, but still. If this were applied to something on a grander scale, we could have an alright mystery author on our hands.
The sex scene looks awfully brief, but it's still of a quite good quality. No-one seems to think of foreplay in quite this way very often. This is the only time I've ever actually seen a positioning like this in any lemon: I daresay there are others, but this is the only one I've seen, and it's quite novel.
It's a good sex scene, with novelty, discription, and, to an extent, sensation, but it's too brief.
I'm also dissapointed we didn't get to see th other lemon scene.
One, final joke, before, like a dead cowboy, Coyote wonders of and leaves us all. Such a pitty: I'd rather like more from this fellow.
Anyway, to the reveiw. It's a Matt Izzy coupling: that has my interest right there. Comparitively, that's a highly original choice. And that first paragraph encompasses everything everyone hates about computers in a nutshell.
This leads to an amusing turn of events with sporting apperatus. "Pain" was used twice in one sentence, which doesn't sound very good. Missed the apostrophe out of "Joe's", too. Oh, well. Proofread, dear authors, proofread.
Now, that first passage has established everything. It uses a cheerful and humourous outlook to tell the story: even the heel of Matt's temper is turned into a small joke. The story has atmosphere. Write that down.
Izzy is spot on, isn't he? Coyote is a dab hand and making him lovable. "I'm going to make it L33T." I hate that code, but I couldn't help but smile.
"His naked lover laughed slightly.
""One step at a time, please!""
That's contradictory. Always watch out for that. Also, I have have come to the conclusion that the Digital World is basicly a harem: everyone's so fast, it may as well be.
Further humour from Matt. I like this chap: the comedic work just has layers of style. It's all derived from the characters, and nothing impossible happens. Comedy is at it's finest within the realms of plausiblity, although a good serving of Python is always welcomed.
A return to an earlier incident in the story: the way it all ties together like this gives me the impression that the author's thought long and hard about the effects of every event that occurs in this story. There may not be many, but still. If this were applied to something on a grander scale, we could have an alright mystery author on our hands.
The sex scene looks awfully brief, but it's still of a quite good quality. No-one seems to think of foreplay in quite this way very often. This is the only time I've ever actually seen a positioning like this in any lemon: I daresay there are others, but this is the only one I've seen, and it's quite novel.
It's a good sex scene, with novelty, discription, and, to an extent, sensation, but it's too brief.
I'm also dissapointed we didn't get to see th other lemon scene.
One, final joke, before, like a dead cowboy, Coyote wonders of and leaves us all. Such a pitty: I'd rather like more from this fellow.