05-04-2006, 08:38 AM
I've readed it all, and I have some things to say...
For the plot, it was great- it was quite something I would have expected for a lemon like this. I was kinda wondering that Gaomon's jealousy wasn't a normal one from a boy- even if he was gay. So my opinion is, you did an excelent job here.
For the characters, I believe you followed their personalities- they were quite loyal to the episodes I was able to see, and it wasn't that bad to add your own touch. Good job here as well.
For the grammar, I found some minimal errors- in the beggining for example, there's a problem with reporting the sentence. Nothing you can't correct doing double check.
For the scene, simply liked it- I kinda expected you to make Gaomon be a herm, it would be rather interesting, but oh well- I really loved how it developed though. Really cool in here.
If I had to give a qualification to this story- it'd be 9.
It's a great story RenaFan, good job!
For the plot, it was great- it was quite something I would have expected for a lemon like this. I was kinda wondering that Gaomon's jealousy wasn't a normal one from a boy- even if he was gay. So my opinion is, you did an excelent job here.
For the characters, I believe you followed their personalities- they were quite loyal to the episodes I was able to see, and it wasn't that bad to add your own touch. Good job here as well.
For the grammar, I found some minimal errors- in the beggining for example, there's a problem with reporting the sentence. Nothing you can't correct doing double check.
For the scene, simply liked it- I kinda expected you to make Gaomon be a herm, it would be rather interesting, but oh well- I really loved how it developed though. Really cool in here.
If I had to give a qualification to this story- it'd be 9.
It's a great story RenaFan, good job!
![[Image: FearthatPlushy.jpg]](http://i24.photobucket.com/albums/c40/BlackSpyromv_33/FearthatPlushy.jpg)
