The Dreamer Girl's Writings, Works and Thoughts

[Dreamer]

Where We Are Now

I don't know how we got

from there to here

We can barely talk to each

other without getting angry

I blame you and you blame

me and we both know

who messed up

We both know the truth and

how you can never take it back

or make it better

But, I hate it when one minute

you're fine with me and the

next

You act like an ass towards me

How did we once love each other

so much and how did you once

worship me

But now, we hate each other beyond

what words can say

We yell and fight all of the time

We can't even be friends and I

don't know what to do about it

I could just tell you to fuck yourself

and to never speak to me again

But could I really be that cruel?

Why should I even care?

This morning I talked to you on

the phone because you called me

I could have disconnected the phone

and gone undisturbed back to sleep

But instead of doing that

I picked up the phone and talked to

you as tired as I was

It was all for nothing because

you took your shitty little attitude out

on me

And I had to put up with it and

get pissed off too early in the morning

You're acting all depressed and saying

you can't deal with it

Can't take life and that you may kill

yourself

You talk about how you don't want pity

or to hear a lecture

I'm almost sorry that I ever cared about

you because you piss me off

And one of these days, you'll piss

me off enough to smack the shit out

of you

I couldn't help but feel a little sorrow

because I wondered how we got from

there to here

How we got from love to hate

How we got from lovers to enemies

I'm sad because it had to be this way

But I will not cry because it was meant

to happen

If I would have known it would end this

way

I wouldn't have tried and I would have had

nothing to do with you

I can only hope that things work out with you

Because just as much as I can hate, I

can love and forgive

But, you've gone too far this time and we

can't ever be as close as we used to be again

After I thought about all of this

I went to sleep accepting that this is just

how life is and that I'll deal with this

with time

And I went to sleep smiling as I remembered

all the fun we had

And I went to sleep sad as I thought of

what a shame it was

I know that you may not survive your life

Because you may end up taking it

But, I only wish that you weren't so pathetic

and weak

Maybe I could go to sleep easier if I knew

for sure you'd make it

But I can't for now but maybe there is some

reassurance in knowing that I tried as hard

as I could and did all I could

I just wanna tell you that despite all of the

hate you have for me

I wish you the best of luck and I hope you

make it.

By Melissa Y. Vasquez
6/25/06