02-27-2006, 12:37 PM
First let me say that I've been through a similar situation in terms of having unfaithful parent{s}. Back in 1994 my folks were going through a hard time. Their love for each other just died and one day my father left our family going across the country to Idaho. He was still married when he had an affair getting the woman pregnant. He then came back, they got divorced and he moved to Idaho. Since then he's moved at least 7 times from Idaho, back to New York, different areas of New York before finally settling in the state of Washington. Now its 2006 and I've learned to forgive him.
I only see him about 2 times a year. He has MS and is on disability. Before moving to Washington, he actually worked in a tall building mere blocks from where the WTC once stood. So basically I'm not sure if you're trying to express that you're going through is difficult, but know that you're not alone. According to statistics, half of all married couples get divorced. Now about your situation, I must know how old are you? Cause my father didn't get involved in sending me anything adult oriented until I was 18. I remember back in 3rd grade, he wouldn't let me see Jurassic Park.
If you are under 18 I'd have to say what your father is doing is not right. In a sense it might even be against certain laws. Then again I didn't even consider my father to be my ''father'' after what he did at first. Even if he's been caught cheating or openly admitted it, blackmailing should be avoided. It's underhanded and there's no need to stoop to his level. Once again if you're underaged then it would be in your best interests to tell your mother. Please don't think of this reply as orders or like a consuling point of view. I can't decide what you should do in your life although you did ask for suggestions which I'm providing.
I also think if you're family is going through so much deceit that maybe divorce would be a good option. I didn't think of it at first, but in the end it was the best decision that could have been made. Sure I had to move, change school districts and mourn for my father every single night yet if he were to stay married things would have seriously gone down, down downhill from there.
I only see him about 2 times a year. He has MS and is on disability. Before moving to Washington, he actually worked in a tall building mere blocks from where the WTC once stood. So basically I'm not sure if you're trying to express that you're going through is difficult, but know that you're not alone. According to statistics, half of all married couples get divorced. Now about your situation, I must know how old are you? Cause my father didn't get involved in sending me anything adult oriented until I was 18. I remember back in 3rd grade, he wouldn't let me see Jurassic Park.
If you are under 18 I'd have to say what your father is doing is not right. In a sense it might even be against certain laws. Then again I didn't even consider my father to be my ''father'' after what he did at first. Even if he's been caught cheating or openly admitted it, blackmailing should be avoided. It's underhanded and there's no need to stoop to his level. Once again if you're underaged then it would be in your best interests to tell your mother. Please don't think of this reply as orders or like a consuling point of view. I can't decide what you should do in your life although you did ask for suggestions which I'm providing.
I also think if you're family is going through so much deceit that maybe divorce would be a good option. I didn't think of it at first, but in the end it was the best decision that could have been made. Sure I had to move, change school districts and mourn for my father every single night yet if he were to stay married things would have seriously gone down, down downhill from there.