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[My First digimon Yaoi Lemon]
#3
Spelling, grammar, and inventiveness are all an issue. tHere was no storyline, and the sex scene was short and hashed out. Flesh it out a little. I'd suggest reading other author's works and drawing in their narritve styles to create your own.

I'm going to put this in Author's Domain.
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Messages In This Thread
[My First digimon Yaoi Lemon] - by Kubari - 07-08-2007, 01:31 AM
RE: [My First digimon Yaoi Lemon] - by Erethzium - 07-08-2007, 02:10 AM
RE: [My First digimon Yaoi Lemon] - by Herr Mullen - 07-08-2007, 09:11 AM
RE: [My First digimon Yaoi Lemon] - by Kubari - 07-08-2007, 06:18 PM