First off, Ello to all you out there that are reading this. Second, I am not going to say that I own Digimon, nor am I
to say that I do, for all you know, I could ... but I don't. Damn... I just contradicted myself ... oh well...
Anyway. Third, This story is intended for mature audiences only. It contains scenes of sexuality, vulgar language, and comments about suicide, if you are offended, and or hurt by any of this, please stop reading now....
You still there? All right, you have another chance...
O.O I can still see you..... (Hehe, I am such a loser...)
All righty then, you agree not to go off screaming and crying to someone, complaining about me. ^.^; I hope.
Finally, I don't really know if you would call this my first "Lemon", for I have another, a long one, in the process, I have been working on it for some time, and I am hoping to have it up soon, anyway, but this is the first "Lemon" that I have completed, it is not as big of a story line as the other, but when writing something long gets tiresome after a while, so I figured that I would write some little tidbits in-between. Now, I hope you enjoy "Does Suicide Equal Love?" part 1
This "Lemon" has nothing to do with "Tamers", "Partners", or "Digi Destined". It just takes place in the digital world.

"I can't take this any more! Am I destined to go my life not knowing love?" Gabumon ran through the woods in a depressive rage, trying so hard to forget what just happened, but it all plays back in his head like a broken record.

He was sitting on the bank of a river, its water was just as clear as the beautifully cloudless sky. The sun stood high in the air, shining its warm rays brightly down upon the peaceful world. He splashed his feet around slowly, not really wanting anyone to know he was there.

‡The river, he found it one night, well, more along the lines of, he fell into it when he was in a depressed rant. He has gone years without anyone to love, and every where he looked he would see couples kissing each other, talking romantically into there ears, or even come upon s few who were inter twined in mating. At first it meant nothing to him, he figured he would wait it out, his mate would come along. But no. No matter what he tried, he couldn't catch the eye of any female Digimon, although, on some occasions, he would spot a blur of white, out of the corner of his eye, as if it were watching him, but when he would turn to get a good look, there wasn't anyone or anything there. So he figured that he was seeing things.

One night, the moon full and shining beautifully, he was walking around in a large forest when he heard a scream. Naturally, he ran to see if anyone needed help, but when he came upon the small clearing, he was struck with both relief, and shock. He saw a patamon couple in a patch of grass having sex.

The relief was that no one was in any kind of danger ... the shock was that, well, yes, he has seen two Digimon mating, but he never stayed to actually watch, but this time, he felt compelled to watch them. The moon light glistened on the beads of sweat that had formed on the male Patamon, as he thrust back and forth, in and out of the female. Gabumon stood behind some brush so he wouldn't be seen, and he tried to make as little noise as possible, but even if, he wouldn't have been. They were so involved in each other that even if the world had exploded, they wouldn't have noticed, so the moans of shear pleasure that escaped the females mouth would dull out a simple snap of a twig.

Gabumon saw that the male started thrusting faster and harder into her and then arched his back and rose his head towards the sky as if trying to reach for the moon. Gabumon has never witnessed this before, but he knew what was going on, so he moved a little closer to see what would happen next, but he remained covered in the brush. The male thrust a few more times, but then he slumped down and lay on the female, both of them had a smile on there faces. He slid his cock out of her, and Gabumon saw small blobs of liquid fall out of her pussy onto the grass. The male laid next to the female, both of them panting and sweating, and licked he cheek, they gave each other a small kiss on the lips, then the male spoke. "I love you." And they then went into another, deeper kiss.

At this point, Gabumon had stopped watching them. When the male had said "I love you.", Gabumons head filled with the pain of confusing questions. *Will I ever get to experience that, will I ever get to tell someone that I love them, or am I to go on forever, never being able to feel or express love? * These questions hurt him so much that he stood up and ran from the couple, hoping to leave the thoughts as well.
He held his head with his hands while he ran with his eyes closed almost tripping over and falling with every step he took, but he didn't care, he just wanted to be calm and at ease. He didn't run long before he left the forest, where a vast field lay. The end of the field could not be seen by any Digimon from the forest, all that was seen was the mountains beyond. Shortly after where the forest ended and the field began, there was the river, Gabumon forgot didn't about this and ran strait into it. After coming up for a gasp of breath, he had found that he was more relaxed and at ease in the water, so he returned here whenever he felt down.‡

A snap of a twig made him jump and turn around, almost loosing his balance and falling into the water.

"Who's there?" He asked, a slight quiver in his voice. All he saw behind him was forest. A bunch of trees, some under brush, and, after giving a light gasp, he saw movement. A blur of white was there, but it disappeared just as quickly as a flash of lightning. "Hello?" His voice was a mer whisper as he took a slow step forwards, towards the trees. As he got closer, he heard, what sounded like, giggling. He picked up his stepping, and came upon what had disturbed his quiet time. Gabumons heart sank as he saw that same Patamon couple, from that time ago, playing together.

It looked like they were playing tag, but with a twist. Who ever was "It" would have to tackle, pin down, and kiss the other. Gabumon was happy to see that there was, again, no threat, but still, just as before, the questions filled his mind with a fierce pain. *They are having so much fun, why can't I have that? Am I being selfish for wanting to be happy? Should I even be allowed to be happy? * Once again Gabumon closed his eyes, grabbed and held his head, and ran, but this time he wasn't running in the direction of the water. No. This time he was running straight towards a cliff. One that if he continued to run towards, he would run off it, and fall to his death.

The sad thing is that Gabumon know about this cliff. Several times he would go to it, and just stare down, wanting to jump, but could never. This time was different. This time, his want to jump felt more like a need. His mind, the part of it that he still had control over, was set, telling him hat this was the only way.

"I can't take this anymore! Please, leave me alone!" He shouted at the top of his lungs, not really knowing if what was happening to him was from within or without. Either way, his message was sent out, loud and clear, only it fell upon ears that were not there. Gabumon opened his eyes to see how much farther until his peace. He saw that the trees had stopped and that the path was narrowing so he quickly came to a stop. He took a few steps and looked down. He was there, at the precipice. His final resting place...


Man, what a drag.

Does Gabumon jump?
Will he ever find love?
And what is up with that white blur he keeps seeing?
Find out in "Does Suicide Equal Love" part 2.

Well, there you go, The first "Lemon", if you would call it that, by me, CZD. I hope you liked it. And even if you didn't I would appreciate any comments, complaints and such, just E-mail me at ^.^
Oh, and before I go, I want to say Thank you to the greatest person I have ever had the chance to meet, well, meet via AOL. Thank you Hernan, for giving me many a pushes, for ... man, for everything. You are truly a great person. I love you man! ;)